OURPOWERS | VIDEO | PUBLIC

[ikols]

Display Name: LOKIOFASGARD
Profile Photo: [ IMG ]
Notes: #howdoyoudofellowmortals #q&a #aesir

[ No horns today! Just a guy in a green hoodie with clashing eyes. ]

If I had a penny for every time I am corrected about not, in fact, being a god, I would have a buttload of pennies. I understand the mortal scope is narrow but really, it's quite rude to tell a person they are an alien or a confused immortal. [ Loki shrugs where he is sat in his kitchen at the breakfast bar, nursing an iced coffee and some form of (delicious!) bacon bap. He holds up his fingers. ] I am currently the patron god of: chaos, mischief, lies, stories, outcasts, all those less than hetero sexual acts, those helpful little tabs you use in your notebooks to faster find things ...

[ Tearing a bite out of his bap, he thumbs some ketchup off the corner of his mouth and chews thoughtfully. ]

Would it help if this was a Q-and-A session? Alright. Have at thee with the rude queries, o' mighty rabble. I reserve the right to tell moronic inquiries to fuck off.

Oh! Also. I have worked out a spell that will allow me to extract your universe designation if you are not aware of it and I need volunteers. It's a kind of timestamp or reality-stamp, rather, and it is written into your very being, flesh and spirit. Interdimensional reality warpers usually know theirs but the majority of folks don't, and I wish to build a map of each realm from which we all hail. I promise the process does not hurt! You may get a little woosy and re-live the best or worst moments of your life while under the spell, so keep that in mind before offering.

Thanks so much! You may ask your invasive questions now, as I am sure you are dying to do.

Comments

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

... Wait, hold up, do you know my real one?

[ She doesn't sound accusatory or even particularly annoyed, Doreen just has a hard time remembering who's discovered her secret identity! ]

[ikols]

You gave me your parents' address and was worried I would deduce your secret identity, which I kinda did, but I have no problem using the name of the person you pretend to be when you're not being the real you: Squirrel Girl. I thought it best to ask since the last time we met you said you were in a, and I quote, "really healthy place where both identities were integrated as a cohesive whole".

[ SHRUG. Come inside with him, the coffee line waits for no god or squirrel! ]

Whatever you prefer, girly.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Ohhh, right, I forgot you were from future-times! Future-me sounds pretty well adjusted, good for her.

[ She follows him indoors, already eyeballing the drink menu. Onwards, to fancy steamed latte drinks! ]

Let's stick with Squirrel Girl, otherwise I'm gonna have to duck into the washroom or something to tuck the tail back into my pants, and then it'd be a whole Thing. Thanks for asking, though!

... Wait, did you meet my parents?!

[ikols]

No probs. My super secret name is now Luke, for the record. I don't know why, I feel like secret identities suddenly became all the rage again lately.

[ Buying them steamy lattes!! With cream! And syrups! ]

Didn't meet your parents, that might have freaked them out, right! Worse, they would have thought I was a gentleman caller!

[ If a scream could be a wide-eyed look, he wears it. ]

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

[ Aw yeah, she is going full hazelnut syrup on hers! The barista even draws a little acorn in the foam to match Doreen's earrings, and she slips her an extra tip as thanks. ]

Ohthankgod. [ Doreen buries her face in her hands the minute they sit down. The relief is palpable! ]

That's not a dunk on you! You'd be a great gentleman caller for someone who was looking. They wouldn't have freaked out, but my mom is insanely quick on the draw with baby photos, so I am very glad that I don't have to do damage control.

And tell Luke that it's nice to 'meet' him! [ She sells this bit with an exaggerated wink and a big grin. ]

[ikols]

No offence taken, Luke says Hi back and that he has nothing but respect for your mother's baby album.

[ Buying them a few pastries to make their way through, he tears into a raspberry croissant and sips his latte with a happy hum. ]

In all honesty, there is little to do in between world-altering problems in this realm besides see which version of the people you know you fancy.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

[ Likewise, Doreen is in cinnamon bun heaven over here! ]

I'm still in the 'find stable housing and an income that isn't a sketchy unlimited credit card' stage of this whole situation, but I'm glad you've found a hobby! This multiversal stuff is wild, huh? There's a Doc Ock here from a universe where he's actually a really nice guy! And... actually, I think that's the only alternate-universe person I've met so far?

[ She takes a sip of her drink, thinking this over. ]

I ran into Billy a while back, and Ms Marvel, but I'm pretty sure they're from back home. I heard there's like three Spider-Men running around, though!

[ikols]

The supervillains from home are so much worse than the guys dropping into this realm, right?

[ If Victor shows up Loki will start caring about the Bad Guys(TM) but until then, he thinks he is the worst of anyone around. No one can match him in strength but Strange if he wants to go magic-nuclear (and thankfully Stephen is somewhat adjacent to being a friend).

He laughs into his pastry. ]

There are four Spider-Men, the web situation on skyscrapers is becoming noticeable on a slow day.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

God, right? I don't want to think about what any of them would do with an unlimited credit card.

[ Aaaand then Doreen almost chokes on that cinnamon bun! ]

Four?! That's... that's so many spidered men! Oh my gosh, we're gonna have to get them numbered jerseys or something.

[ikols]

Mine goes by Three, if we are going to buy them shirts for the holidays.

[ Waggling his brows. ]

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Wait, do you mean the one from our universe, or...?

[ GAAAAAAAAAAASP ]

Loki Middlename Laufeyson, are you Spider-Man's gentleman caller?!

[ikols]

[ His eyes widen with the promise of the truth, fingers drumming on the table. ]

I am Spider-Man's gentleman-caller, and he is hot!

[ Hooting for the rest of the café to hear! ]

I've been waiting for an excuse to use this icon for SO LONG

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Oh my gosh!!

[ She is just as enthusiastic, and has no concept of the word 'subtlety'! ]

What! What! How did this happen! How long has it been happening? Is it our universe's Spidey? I didn't know he swung that way, no pun intended for once, but that's really cool!

[ikols]

Not ours, he's from a different universe. One without other heroes. Just Spider-Man.

[ Pulling an eek face. ]

He's almost thirty, very rugged and sweet-natured.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Oof. That's got to be rough for him.

[ She pulls a similar face, although hers is more of a sympathetic wince. ]

... Oh, hey! Is he from the same world as Otto? He said something similar. Seriously, that world sounds so weird.

[ikols]

I don't think so, he would have said. But! [ Cheering up now: ] He's happier here, and with me. Especially with me.

[ AHUEHUEHUE. ]

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

D'awww!

[ Doreen is tempted to go for some eyebrow-waggling for a moment, but seeing Loki all twitterpated like this is honestly way too cute for that. ]

That's adorable! You two are adorable! I hope you go on a a ton of spider-dates, and swing all over town!

[ she ships you two SO HARD NOW ]