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[definecat]

Display Name: Sleeper
Profile Photo: The image is solid black. That's it.
Notes: They're pretending this is an accidental video someone's pet posted to see what happens. Something like this if you need an idea.

[The video opens on a view of what appears to be one of the rooms in the Diadem, but the angle is that of a phone just left at an odd angle, probably against a pillow on the bed if the rumpled comforter is anything to go by, but it's hard to tell because the image keeps getting blocked by a black and yellow something that isn't in focus at first. After a while, it becomes clear that this is a cat, pawing and sniffing at the phone as if it isn't sure what is going on.

Finally, the cat sits back and meows, bats at the phone, and the feed ends.]

Comments

[definecat]

Perhaps you already have.

[louder_than_words]

i havent met any cats

>>Video

[definecat]

[This time there isn't much in the way of pretense of a cat using a camera on the phone.]

Hello, my name is Sleeper. And, under some definitions, would count as a cat.

[louder_than_words]

[This is... not-expected. ]

But... not all def-in-ish-ons?

[She sounds out the word syllable by syllable with a hint of an implacable accent, like words are somewhat foreign on her tongue.]

I like your colors. [Black and yellow... a good set.]

[definecat]

I am an alien with no fixed form. I just like this one.

[As an example they let the colors swirl a little like mixing paint before returning to roughly the same markings.]

Some people would argue that the cat is a specific species or family of mammals native to Earth. Others might include animals that superficially resemble them, like how some people include whales with fishes because both have fins and swim in the ocean.

[louder_than_words]

Cool.

Are... whales not fish? [They live in the ocean. They have fins. Of course they're fish.]

[definecat]

Whales are mammals. They breathe air and give live birth and rear their offspring on milk, which are all mammal traits. The looking like fish is actually a relatively recent development for them. They are more closely related to you than your goldfish.

[louder_than_words]

I'm not related to any whales.

[That's not how families work.]

[definecat]

According to evolutionary theory, all Earth life is related to some degree. But not in any way where you might point at a dolphin and say that's your cousin. There are millions of years and plenty of generations of distance between you. If you go back around thirty generations or so, all living humans are related to each other.